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Why white men love the black woman

Posted by James, 31 Aug

Ever wondered why some white guys, love black women so much?

It seems that being a white male and proclaiming your attraction to black women (not only sexually, but also romantically) may lead to a lot of controversial and dangerous things. Let’s leave the debate of why more black women may be opening themselves up to white guys. The main focus of this debate is: why some white guys are opening themselves to black women. Let’s concentrate on that.

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Most white males don’t feel like they are running short of white women to marry. White males just marry at high rates. So question is: Why black women? The thing is it will not be fair to bundle up black women as one since everyone is their own person… be it in appearance or personality.

However, one thing that a white male friend of mine said… and I let him get away with bundling it all up is: “We love a black woman's confidence, her tenacity and her undeniable achievements in the face of great adversity...᾿ Since this info was coming from a man, there was definitely the mention of the lips, the curves, and that wonderful skin as well.

So what about stereotypes like “black women are either sexually conservative or total sluts?" Many people give so much lip service to interracial dating sites. You would think they have never done it. But those uptight individuals are the ones that spread these stereotypes. What happened to the highly educated black woman? How about the caring, decent and involved black woman?

Probably most white guys and others are confused with the stereotypical trash people spread around and if you are one that falls for such lame ol’ lines, then you sure as hell haven’t dated a black woman.

Bottom line, you don't have to sacrifice who you are for a white guy. They will love you anyway. Just be you and open yourself up… and if you like white guys, some white guy will find you too.

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  1.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    Ladies: friendly, bamba, tatted, bigeyes errrrrbody, LOL. Bamba how yeeeeer doin? @ friendly: I agree. That's why I was talking about my dad. He did impose those religious convictions in our household. As I got older, however, I learned to make decisions for myself. That's not to say I don't believe in him, but I understand the free will he gave us and it is only up to HIM to judge. Yep. @friendly also: Exactly. You understood what I said, I didn't understand what I wrote the first time, LOL. It's true though Friendly. You know, Free Will, he'll judge, he'll decide. He is the only authority I concern myself with! LOL. I don't mind the semi blond look, but tell me Ladies, what do you think of the colors? Red, Green and such all mixed in together? I particularly don't care for it, but whatever floats "the boat." Y'all know what I'm talking about? Now, one color maybe, but I have seen chicks with a rainbow atop their heads all at one time. That's not for me. Others ok, not for me. LOL.

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  2.   Bamababe2k9 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    Yes I agree, I am blessed to have family members and friends who support my choice to date or marry whomever I want as long as I am happy. A lot of people don't have that in their lives.

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  3.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @ Bamababe2k9 Yes that video is right on time. I hadn't seen it. I like Alicia Keys songs too. She was right on point with the topic. It is sad that people have to go through so much because if what others (famiy, society) think or don't want them to do. It is even more sad that sometimes it make people reluctant to be together because of all the drama that will occur. That is why it is so important to have real love and on a superficial one. Because our biggest criticizers could be the ones that we love most (our family).

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  4.   Bamababe2k9 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    If you do it right it can be very pretty but some women go to far with it.

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  5.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @Bamababe2k0 I have seen some black womenwith tapered blonde hair and I always thoght they really looked sharp.

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  6.   Bamababe2k9 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    About hair care, I've been wearing my hair short for years and my mom and grandmother had a fit because they thought it was too short, but for me it was easier to take care of and it made me look younger. Plus I dye my hair honey blond which draws a lot of attention from the men folk. :) But I love my hair.

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  7.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @ PetiteChick Please forgive me, your retraction went over my head and I didn't realize that you were referring to what I was talking about earlier regarding long hair and men. I think? But I do agree that you can't really prove that point with the bible because like you said God gives us a free will. I believe that he does that because he wants us to make our own decisions and not be running around like robots all doing the same things for the same reasons. We all have our own set of circumstances. My mom has long hair from her indian heritage....but inspite of my dad's love for it she still chops it off into a high top ladys fade. She says it is just too hot. He still loves her just as much. he ain't going no where. He love her not her hair. Plus, he don't have to have all that hot hair on his head in the summer. We really have to do what we do what we like, when it all boils down to it. Yes, our hair is our glory, in that we can style it and make ourselves look nice. But like India Arie points out if we lose it to cancer or some medical treatment God still loves us and we are still valuable. So, I agree completely with you.

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  8.   Bamababe2k9 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    Alicia Keys new video seems to hit the nail on the head with the topic. http://www.youtube.com/user/aliciakeys?blend=2&ob=1

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  9.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @ PetiteChick I understand what you mean about people trying to use words from the bible to control people. believe me. Most people just take text and nothing else. You have to look at who is saying it and look at the time they are saying and the influence that they are speaking under. Remember they even used a few out of context poorly understood words from what God had said and used it to cricify him. There is no one that knows that better than Christ himself and his followers. That is why I do what I believe to be right. Some omen have short hair and wear short styles. Women with really long thick hair get their hair thined out because it is too heavy and hot. I don't believe that anyone should impose personal or religious values on others either. It is just like the subject on divorce. Okay, now I won't even get that controversy started. lol.

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  10.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @ Bamba 8:22a.m. Where Are you?????

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  11.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @friendly retraction: Type too doggone fast.... I agree with that, but no where in the Bible does it say she can’t cut it!!!! Meant: I DON'T agree with that because no where in the Bible does it say we can't cut it, dye it, lighten it, so in other words the Bible saying "our Glory" meaning we should leave it as God has blessed us with it. But he gave it to us to with what we please. Free will is what God has given us!

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  12.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    Comment by friendly13 on 13 May 2010: Hey just to laugh…has every body seen Norbit. lol. Remember his wife and how she was the diva in public but at home she would be mean to her husband and have her hair looking crazy. lol. ------------------------------------------------- RASPUTIA, HOW YERRRRR DOIN? LOL. -------------------------------------------------- I am not going to lie, I do like to look good for my man. If I am looking good in public, I am certainly going to look good for him. Keeping my hair up also makes me feel more confident and beautiful for myself as well. -------------------------------------------------- YOU SOUND LIKE A PRIMPER. I PRIMP. MY FAMILY IS ALWAYS COMPLAINING ABOUT ME. I DON'T LEAVE MY HOUSE UNLESS EVERY HAIR IS IN PLACE AND I LOOK NICE. I AIN'T ALWAYS DRESSED UP BUT I'M GONNA LOOK CUTE, EITHER WITH JEANS OR WHATEVER. LORD....WHAT DID I SAY WHAT WE HAVE TO GO THROUGH? LOL. YES, I LOVE IT. I WOULDN'T TRADE BEING A WOMAN FOR ANYTHING IN THE WORLD. IT FEELS GOOD. HEY DON'T YOU THINK WE'RE THE SMARTEST OF THE SEXES? Shhhhhhhhh I ain't say that. LOL. --------------------------------------------------- If my hair is not right my girls be gettin out the comb and curling irons saying come here mama you ain’t going nowhere with me with your hair like that. lol. My girls are divas. I love their youth. They try to keep me looking young when life sometimes has me frazzeled. lol. ------------------------------------------------ My son, daughter and grandson comment on me all the time. My son was like, where you think you going? Ain't that too short? I'm like NO. Above the kneed is appropriate for bare legs. I ask him about a new wig I my have purchased, he gives me the thumbs up or down. I tell him I bought this, it's mine! Too bad you don't like it. --------------------------------------------------- I want to also be an example for them so they won’t just give up and walk around looking crazy like they have given up on life. It is amazing how a womans hair reflects a lot about how she feels about herself. ---------------------------------------------------- yes, yes, yes! I think is something inherent in us, especially in America. I can't speak for other cultures. But like I said my father always said the "Bible says" a woman's hair is her glory. I agree with that, but no where in the Bible does it say she can't cut it!!!!

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  13.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    Sara, I guess it goes back to what is says about the beauty of a woman. Her hair! I don't agree with that premise (taught this as Baptist with a Deacon father) Lord hab mercy. My father would not approve of cutting of hair if he were alive today. Thanks for sharing!

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  14.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @bigeyes, LOL Peace Love and Hair Grease. I agree sistah. I prefer natural styles but my behind don't know what to do with it. I see lovely pics of women with their naturals all aflow. I don't have a clue about what to do with natural styles. My hair has not seen a perm in over 5 years. For one things, it seems like something happened to them where they didn't last as long as they used to. Has anyone else noticed this? So, I found myself having to re-touch too often which ain't a good look for my hair. I gave it up. My daughter had the same problem. I would use different brands too. Girl, I go back to perms that used to have lye in them. They don't make those no more. I've been perming my hair for years, but after awhile I just kept spenidng my money and the perm lasted for a hot minute. Wrapping it would keep it straighter for a little while, but that's it. I let the perm grow out over a series of a year or so. Had the rest cut out and I'm free from that. Then I ain't got no patience AT ALL. AT ALL. That's my problem and one of the reasons I decided to let it be. Listen bigeyes, if you got some tips on lacefronts, do share, my daughter wants to do it, but has no clue. She told me she found some clips on you tube where there are some women demonstrating. The prices have come down dramatically on them, and she can afford one! LOL. Me, I stick to regular curly type wigs, or crimpy look. Bone straight wigs don't look right on me for some reason. Unless it's one I can put in an updo. I like the fros. But when I buy the girly ones they have to fall out after a while to get the look I want. Share the knowledge girl, share, share.

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  15.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    Good morning! @friendly ok now when you go to look for it is either L'Oreal hair fixer or restructuring. Fixer might be in the name. Look for a Blue and White Box. Open it up make sure it has two bottles and some pills wrapped in foil. They used to make one for added body in a reddish pink box, but I can't find that one no where. I hope you like it. When you first start out I think they want you to use at least once a week or something, then every other week. But you'll see on the directions. It worked for me. Your hair will not feel like it is moisturized though. But when you comb it through the hair feels stronger after every use. Let me know how you like it.

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  16.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    Hey just to laugh...has every body seen Norbit. lol. Remember his wife and how she was the diva in public but at home she would be mean to her husband and have her hair looking crazy. lol. I am not going to lie, I do like to look good for my man. If I am looking good in public, I am certainly going to look good for him. Keeping my hair up also makes me feel more confident and beautiful for myself as well. If my hair is not right my girls be gettin out the comb and curling irons saying come here mama you ain't going nowhere with me with your hair like that. lol. My girls are divas. I love their youth. They try to keep me looking young when life sometimes has me frazzeled. lol. I want to also be an example for them so they won't just give up and walk around looking crazy like they have given up on life. It is amazing how a womans hair reflects a lot about how she feels about herself.

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  17.   Hannes72 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @Laurelton I visit London soon, than you going to show me if you are that good. I dont talk about my skills, we will see what happends @ DeppenChick You love boxing, did you ever eat a punch from a heavy weigther, I dont think so so please shut up!

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  18.   scoff/sarah says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    I could get into some very humorous stories about learning about women and their hair. More so many years ago when Sarah & I first met, WoW what an education. Way back I think Sarah or maybe I posted a comment about a fellow worker (girl our age) that had long kinda of reddish straight hair, Sarah's comments about her were always negative, primarly because of the hair. I still joke about it with her, of course she laughs about it now, as she knows it was just a young person being foolish. Bottom line if it makes you feel good wear your hair the way you want, it's your hair. BTW if your happy with it your man will be happy too. Love to all Scoff

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  19.   bigeyes31 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @friendly and Petitechick I just joined back in here on the tail end but I always enjoy talking about the diversity of black hair!I even considered going to beauty school but end up learning to do my own quick weaves recently...LOL still practicing. I think HOWEVER we as black women choose to wear our hair is our choice. Not too long ago, there were not too many hair products or choices afforded to us as black women. So I say if you want to wear wigs, weaves braids or whatever is YOUR and OUR business. The point is,as you both alluded to is.....taking care of your hair and making sure that it is healthy. Wearing weaves allows me the choice of changing style and color without damaging my hair. I like changing my styles sometimes with the change of my moods. It's a black woman's perogative,any woman's perogative to do with her hair as she pleases. The Bible says a woman's hair is her glory. Nothing can be more beautiful than having a head full of healthy hair. I totally agree with conditioning the hair. I wear weaves which actuallly causes my hair to grow even longer than it was before. I have always had thick hair but soft and long but I always wanted it longer. I found that placing a barrier between hair and the weaves while providing a nourishing "ecosystem" if you will underneath just made my hair even nicer and more manangeable. It is down my back...so yeah nothing wrong with braids(definitiely grows my hair)and wigs,which I wear also, or whatever....do what you like it's YOUR hair. Peace,love and hair grease...:-)

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  20.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @ PetiteChick My hair always needs restructuring. I am going to try that product by Loreal.

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  21.   PrettySmart says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    Interesting article. I especially like when the author wrote, "bottom line, you don’t have to sacrifice who you are for a white guy. They will love you anyway." The comments, however, are pure nonsense.

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  22.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    RETRACTION @ Laurelton @ 8:46p.m. This not reading mess is beginning to have an affect on me too. THANK GOD YOU WERE SAYING: BOXING IS A REAL SPORT! Disregard my prior statement. It was made in error, THANK God, cause Boxing is the best sport to me! Love it. Comment by PetiteChick on 12 May 2010: @ Laurelton: By the way, MMA don’t count. Boxing is a REAL SPORT. I know the white boys are going to respond but that is how I feel. Good day. ———————————————- That’s all I like in the way of “sports.” Why ain’t it a sport, doggone it? Splain puhhleeease?

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  23.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @ Hannes72 8:35p.m. I'm not going to provoke you anymore. I only do that because you do the same to me. You know, tit for tat. I don't care what you think, really. I'm ready to move on and have other discussions here about other things. I am enjoying my conversations with the women here. So, I'm done. Anything you want to say or do after this is fine by me. You'll be ignored. I have learned one good thing by watching Ms. Bamba and Ms. Friendly. And that is sometimes it's just no worth it. I'm used to having to fend for myself in a manner this aggressive, so it's what I do in everything I do. But these women have taught me at least, that sometimes some things are just not worth the effort. Even a 50 year old ghetto gal like me can get that! I'm happy you live in Austria. And I am PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN CITIZEN.

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  24.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @ Laurelton: By the way, MMA don’t count. Boxing is a REAL SPORT. I know the white boys are going to respond but that is how I feel. Good day. ---------------------------------------------- That's all I like in the way of "sports." Why ain't it a sport, doggone it? Splain puhhleeease?

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  25.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 13 May 10

    @friendly: Sistah, I used to get my hair braided around every 5 or six weeks or so for about 5 years. I went to an African shoppe. Well let me tell you, those White women come to that shoppe from all over the borough (even the richy part) to have the women from Senegal to their extensions. This particular shoppe is small and in a diverse area where I live and it got a right up in the local paper that the owner has kept and framed. They be in there. They come to Her...because she's fast and much cheaper than going to their own salons. Yep. Seen it many times. They are the ones who started the extension thing I think. They could afford it way back at first. Then when it went mainstream and became affordable for more women then is when I believe Black women began to enjoy it as well. You right, girl! See, Friendly that's what I'm trying to avoid. My patience is lacking for a beauty shop every weekend. If you can get in and get out fast that's good. Once upon a time there were beauty schools in Harlem, NY where I used to live. I don't think they exist anymore. There is now some new talk in NYC about making the hair braiders get their licenses like regular beauticians. I kind of think they should. But what concerns me most is the cleanliness of their places. Their combs and other things they used. I would wash and condition my hair good before braiding. There is this product called L'Oreal hair restructuring. It comes in a blue and white box. Blue pills to be dropped in a liquid. Shake it up till the pill dissolves and apply this INSTEAD OF a conditioner. It works. You see good results immediately, for helping with breakage. But after that I still need a nice Shea butter or something like Moisture Max. The water in my home is hard and bad on my skin and everything. I have to buy these deep conditioning things. OMG. Friendly, what price beauty? Us women have to go through to look half-way decent. LOL.

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  26.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ PetiteChick You know it is funny that a lot of people don't even realize that white women get extensions and wear pieces too. They just think we are doing it because of our hair texture. It is also a very glamorous and empowering thing for us women to be able to change our hair color and style for a romantic dinner or a special occassion. Yes, you are right about the conditioning and no mousse thing. That hard stuff will tear hear cleanout. My hair does do a lot better when I get a deep protien conditioner. I go to the beauty school. It is cheap and I can go every week, when possible. The thing I like about wigs is that you can look like you just came out of the beauty salon as often as you want too. It is an empowering item to have especially for work and meetings.

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  27.   Malarki5 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ everyone, those interested in the logic behind some of the nonsenses sprouted by certain people on here should read this extraordinary exchange between these two folks lol Hannes’ said: I think a black woman… have a lot of testosterones, and burn fat faster. There is no comperism between a Black and a white body. The black can reduce weight but still retain muscles. We have Africans in the gym who have no idea from workout or sports-nutrition. The have no system in their training-plan but look awesome. Testosterone is the key to everything; Power, youth, fitness, wellness. Friendly13 replied: As far as Black people having more testosterone; I do not agree. I have some white girlfriends who can hold their own in the ring. One of them even played boys football in high school, and was one of the stars on the team. White women can be some of the most athletic and adventerous people around. Menelik says: it’s true; white females tend to be MORE athletic, muscular, and aggressive, than Black females. It’s the testosterones, you see! Lol Friendly13 said: I will say that I do have MORE testosterone than I would like to have because I am VERY aggressive. Menelik replies: and very rational, too lol Menelik Charles London England

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  28.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    Hannes Calling a black man a sellout is "fighting words". Trust me, you wouldn't want London to beat you up. Unless, you got "boxing skills" yourself. By the way, MMA don't count. Boxing is a REAL SPORT. I know the white boys are going to respond but that is how I feel. Good day.

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  29.   Hannes72 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    Superior, superior, you always repeat the same words. You provoke me and than you ask me to leave you alone. You must be kidding, nerd! @Malarki5MenelikFromLondonSelloutTrash Looks like I have touched a nerv. You think you can call anyone stupid??? Just look at the comments you write and the comments you earn, than you know anything, Mr Sellout.

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  30.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    To the Great Ones: Other and Hannes: 1:05p.m. Comment by Ichibod on 12 May 2010: You’re not even reading other people’s comments, are you? I posted the definitions of words that have evidently confused you. Wow, you miss a comma and it caused a misinterpretation, and I used a word that you had no clue as to what it meant, and it cause a misunderstanding. But, you call me a child when you’re the one who can’t seem to let crap that happened last summer go. It’s gone on so long that you don’t even know WHAT you’re responding to WHOM about. This is done. Taking candy from a kid? Grow up. Let this be the last post we have between each other. Unless you plan on answering the questions about how many baby daddies your wife has and how old she was when she lost her virginity (or until you improve your grammar and punctuation), don’t post comments to me. The truth is, no one cared about what you were saying in your first post, so to say that a pre-schooler (you spelled it ‘prescoller’?) could understand it with a comma missing, is probably why you were the only one who could. ---------------------------------------------- It is quite obvious that reading is not a fundamental part of your life experience. With that said, I MUST CO-SIGN WITH ICH HERE AND ASK THAT YOU KEEP YOUR WISDOM TO YOURSELF. I DON'T NEED IT. I HAVE THE INTERNET AND A VAST NETWORK OF FRIENDS WHO CAN GIVE ME THE INTELLECTUAL STIMULATION I NEED. SO, IF YOU WOULD BE SO KIND, LEAVE ME ALONE. I ALWAYS ASK NICELY. ALWAYS. SO, PLEASE REFRAIN FROM COMMENTING TO ME UNLESS I MENTION YOUR NAME. There is no point in going on and on about something you don't understand. Either you "get it" or you don't. I have asked Hannes72 more than once now to leave me alone. He has yet to honor this because he too believes himself to be superior. Good day gentlemen!

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  31.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @Malarki5 @ 12:58p.m. That Hannes dude is a piece of work. Dumber than a door knob. Teeheeeheeeheeee. As the Black folx say in the States: Jumping all in the kool-aide and don't know the flava!!!!!

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  32.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @Hannes 12:50p.m. Oh no superior one. That is not what I do. You see, otherbrother hates my guts. You should read some of the exchanges we have had. I do a lot of sarcastic talking. If you knew our history here you would have been able to pick that up, oh mighty superior one from Austria whose life is so much better than those of us in America. Ask him, he'll tell you. I despise him and he likewise, despises me. Ask anybody else here, they'll tell you that too. Did you notice my sarcasm toward you, oh mighty one. You don't understand much further than your nose. I did tell you once before you should read the "history" of other posts before you going jumping into threads and interjecting your unwanted opinion. You can't do that to save your life because, after all, you are White and superior over me, the Black opinionated - in your face Ghetto woman. YOU MAKE YOURSELF LOOK STUPID EVERY TIME YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH. EVERY TIME, I CAN COUNT ON IT. I LOVE IT. I actually like reading your stuff. Teeheeeheeeeee. *snicerking* (By the way, the term above is sarcastic too).

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  33.   TYRANT says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    Comment by ChocPrncess on 11 May 2010: @ Tyrant…I have the hair that was given to me by my BLACK parents. And to imply that we ALL have the same type of hair is patently ridiculous…we do NOT. I do not like truly ‘nappy’ hard hair. So what? Where did I state ALL blacks had that type of hair. Hmmmmm…I DIDN’T! I also do not like dreds, cornrows or twists much….but I do like naturals….what is your point? TYRANT: You know you're right. On second glance you do have that GOOD HAIR that people just love to brag about. LOL As for what you like, it doesn't matter if you DON'T LIKE truly NAPPY HARD hair. The only people I know that have that kind of hair are people who DON'T take care of their hair, but that's far beyond your grasp. Next time you make a comment about the hair of black people I strongly suggest you THINK first. Then again, who am I kidding, because I've read your stuff and you DON'T THINK at all. Have a nice day ChocPrncess *snicker*

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  34.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ Mr Laurelton Queens Yes, I agree that that is the form of autism they have in its early stage. We are seeing these traits more and more in my 8 year old especially. When he meets people he explains scientific lessons that he has been reading about. The little professor attribute. My 4 year old can organize perfectly. Even his teachers can tell he is smart. He is beginning to say some sentences. I always make a big deal out of it when he says something on his own and not just echoing what he heard. Yes, you are so right about working on the social skills too. I also agree with the comments that you discussed...."From my observation. Taking a child’s passion “can become a career for him”. " I am glad they are doing research also. I want to get an organized project going her too so that we can have an environment where children with autism can live up to their potential. I plan for my sons to go to college like their sisters did. I am determined to prepare them for that. Thanks for your words of encouragement and enlightenment.

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  35.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ tatted2death: Yes, Singer Robin Thicke and Actress Paula Patton also just had their first baby. It is a boy. I looked at their sight and realized that Paula was the teacher in the new movie "Precious" starring Gabrielle Sidebe. I loved her in that movie. She made me cry when she said..."Your baby loves you...I love you."..... (Info on Robin and Paula was retrieved on May 12, 2010 from http://stupidcelebrities.net/2010/04/07/singer-robin-thicke-actress-paula-patton-welcome-baby-boy/golden-globes-7-180110-13/) Precious was a very touching story...I a so glad that Monique won the award also.

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  36.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    HMM Your sons have Asperger's syndrome Basically, extremely intelligent children. Just have to work on their socialization skills. You are doing an excellent job with your kids. It is good they are interested in science and other fields. You want to be able to foresee the future concerning their careers. Yea, they use drugs here in PA. I don't really think kids should be on these drugs. But it calms them down. From my observation. Taking a child's passion "can become a career for him". It kind of reminds me of that movie "Ray Charles". He lost his sight as a child and just adapted to his talents. Kids can be so concerned about what their "peers" think that they get really sensitive about it. I am glad they are doing more research on Autism. PA got some of the best experts in the field. I trained under one. She is absolutely great.

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  37.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ Mr. Laurelton Queens: Yes, you are so right. There is not evidence that shows exactly why. I was shocked when I was told the second child was also autistic. I saw signs and did not want to accept it. I didn't want to believe it. On the other hand, my sons knew all their letters and numbers by sight by the time they were 2.5 years old. They have excellent rote ability. My 8 year old reads college level and learned to play chess by the time he was 5. My 4 year old doesn't talk much but he is very smart too. He is only interested in learning shows. Yes, I have heard of the work they are doing at the university there. I wish we were residents there too. I read the sight to learn what they are working on. I always bought my boys learning toys with lights. I also bought leapfrog DVD's for them. My 4 year old learned all of his letters and sounds watching them with his brother. I was amazed. Even his teachers are amazed that he knows all his letters, shapes, numbers...but he doesn't talk other than echoing. He is very athletic and his brother is very intellectual. My 8 year old reads novels and then tells you about what he read. He started to read his sisters old homeschool chemestry book and became interested in science. You are so right, when they learn they become more focused and calm. I refuse to let them drug my boys. I commend you on your dedication and willingness to work with the children in your community. As far as my family, they help. But I don't like to burden them too much. I have found that I am the best teacher for them. I develop computer programs to help me teach them. I love to make powerpoint flashcards for reading and math to develop rote ability. Then I can build skills from there. I use various methods so that they have three dimensional exposure to what they are learning. My 8 year old is a great speller. They are a joy to me. I just wish my 4 year old would talk and stop screaming at he top of his lungs. He has a High pitched Mariah Carey thing that he does that drives everyone crazy and hurts their ears. My 4 year old also tends to pick up sign language easily. I try to avoid that until he talks. But his teachers are trying to teach him. So I just let him learn whatever.

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  38.   Laurelton says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    Dear Friendly On a serious note. I work with Autistic children. I know how difficult that can be. In PA, they pour a lot of resources in helping children with Autism. I got endless training on it every two weeks. I will give PA that recognition. They truly care about 'all" children. New York is a different story. They don't really know what causes it. It can be a combination of different factors. We basically use Behavior and communication therapies and Educational therapies. It actually works over time. I had hmm three kids for a couple months (School setting and home setting). Their social skills is improving. I try to put a 100 percent into the kids. The way I feel about it is these kids will be adults and they need the best chance in life. Your mother and family will not live forever. Especially, black children I work with. Their mother appreciates me doing my best. I take them out on my own dollar. It kind of forces me to be a role model in the community. I really don't want to be. However, the black community is small here. They just know who you are. I don't do this just for the money. I do it because I care. You have a nice day.

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  39.   Malarki5 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ everyone, those interested in the logic behind some of the nonsenses sprouted by certain people on here should read this extraordinary exchange between these two folks lol Hannes' said: I think a black woman... have a lot of testosterones, and burn fat faster. There is no comperism between a Black and a white body. The black can reduce weight but still retain muscles. We have Africans in the gym who have no idea from workout or sports-nutrition. The have no system in their training-plan but look awesome. Testosterone is the key to everything; Power, youth, fitness, wellness. Friendly13 replied: As far as Black people having more testosterone; I do not agree. I have some long-time white girlfriends who can hold their own in the ring. lol. One of them even played boys football in high school, and was one of the stars on the team. White women can be some of the most athletic and adventerous people around. Menelik says: it's true; white females tend to be MORE athletic, muscular, and aggressive, than Black females. It's the testosterones, you see! Friendly13 said: I will say that I do have MORE testosterone than I would like to have because I am VERY aggressive. Menelik replies: and very rational, too lol Menelik Charles London England

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  40.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ Hannes72: Oh and I forgot, I almost always drink diet soda if I am going to drink a soft drink. Water is always the best option and I love to chew on ice. Oh and I twist when I walk to keep my hips and thights toned. I walk with my arms out so that they do not get too big but maintain a nice feminine shape. I think First Lady Obama has a great body. She is a role model for me. She is so beautiful.

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  41.   friendly13 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ Hannes72: Well, I enjoy McDonald's but do certainly have to limit my visits and make the best choices when I go. I rarely purchase the meal. If I do I split the fries with my boys and only eat about 10 for myself. But I really try to avoid fries. I walk about 5 miles everyday (even with rain or snow). I push my large 4 year old in a strholler for resistance. People laugh because they think it is rediculous to push a perfectly capable boy around in a strholler. They don't see the fitness logic behind it. It is really good for uphill trips. My health is of utmost importance, especially as I get older. If I start feeling jiggling, I cut back on stuff I shouldn't be eating. As far as black people having more testosterone I do not agree. I have some longtime white girlfriends from childhood who can hold their own in the ring. lol. One of them even played boys football in highschool and was one of the stars on the team. White women can be some of the most athletic and adventerous people around. I will say that I do have more testosterone than I would like to have because I am very agressive. But I really think that that varies from person to person. I also think that that is why my sons are both autistic. There is speculation about the high levels of testosterone causing in autistim in children. Again that is not emperical at this point but hypothesized speculation.

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  42.   Hannes72 says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @Malarki5 What can I say, you are just an idiot, there is not a single sign for your theory about my fetish for women who dominate me, you just want to sound interesting by talking some psydo-intellectual. Dont use me to blow PetiteChick (what is the petite part again???) powdered sugar in her ass, just move forward and admit PetiteChick your love, than you can let me out of your courtship! You are the first human beeing that comes to my mind by the term sellout. @SchweinsChick Oh, a new tactic, now you start to lick other members boots to get them on your side. Parallel you pretend that I have said things against the USA, which I did not do, as most here are americans. Should that be overly clever??? Calling me Massa will not instigate the other members here too. Even if you would love to have me as your Master and you to be my servant in your bedroom to push your fat ass around the bed, I have to advice you to go with MenelikSellout. But in that case you would be the Master and he the crawling bug. As for Greece, what the hell got it to to with the topic??? But to appease you, the Euro is still 30% higher than the us dollar. Todays exchange rate is 1,2711 USD for 1 Euro and it is going to be 1,40+USD soon. So shut up. It actually was you who was talking bad about the states if you go back in the postings, you just covered it in a bad-whites-theme. BTW, you should not acvice other black women about there hairs or looks, GET ADVICED - altough, for MenelikSellout it will be enough! @my baby Friendly I did never quit McDonalds, the question is if you can afford it or not. I could not afford to eat nothing else than that and my health is totally important to me, but sometimes it is ok and it is also the question what kind of food you take from McD. you can eat the fries or a sallad as well as you can choose from Cola or water ;) I think a black woman can easily afford bad nutrition, they have a lot of testosteron and burn fat faster. No comperism between a black and a white body. The black can reduce weight but still got muscles. We have africans in the gym who got no idea from workout or sports-nutrition. The have no system in der traings-plan but looks awsome, free testosterone is the key to everything. Power, youth, fitness, wellness. But if you want to look good, a little sport is mandatory. Did I tell you, some of you pics are toooooo cute :D @ the nerds We still got the hair-topic??? Than I have to mention it one more time: Choc got the best hairs in the thread, and for sure one of the best here ;D

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  43.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @bamba My favorite is by Jill Scott: Living My Life Like It's Golden.............

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  44.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @other 4:24am. Forgive me, oh wise one. I did not see that stats the Salassin posted. When I arrived they had already gone up the chain in the never-never land of posts. I never saw them. If I had I would not have bothered to post them because quite frankly it is duplicative in effort. So, since I didn't understand (silly me, I can be like that sometimes yanno) please describe for me and tell me what it is you were trying to say in a clear and concise mannner, so that I may better understand you in all your infinite wisdom. After all, I'm not too old to learn. If a carefully thought out - well presented argument can be given by you, I might just agree. Right now, I still don't get it. (That's me being dumb again)...So, as I asked before if you would be so kind as to allow me to a beacon of your knowledge, I will humbly accept it. Have a good day/morning/nite, whatever!

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  45.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ tatted 4:17a.m. No worries sis. I want a sista thing going on here, LOL. I forgot about Robin Thicke with his fine self. He looks just like his father. The voice alone could drive a woman crazy. Good lawd!!!!!

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  46.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    Comment by Bamababe2k9 on 11 May 2010: Petite Co-Signing While you SCREAM at your woman, there’s a man wishing he could talk softly to her ear… While you HUMILIATE, OFFEND and INSULT her, there’s a man flirting with her and reminding her how wonderful she is. While you HURT your woman, there’s a man wishing he could make love to her. While you make your women CRY there’s a man stealing smiles from her.. Post this if you’re against Domestic Violence

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  47.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @ friendly My daughter will only date Hispanic men. That's it. Nothing more. Although she does have fetish for the White guy in "Smallsville" Tom Wellington. He's cute, but like boy look. She a fool too. Talking about his wife ain't his but she is. She loves that man, and she likes Chris Noth like I do. Lord hab mercy when he was on the sex and the city series I would melt..he's fine girl. That's all I gotta say.

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  48.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @friendly 3:59a.m. Comment by friendly13 on 11 May 2010: RE: The hair stuff…..I know about that too. Boy, I don’t even want to be seen unless my hair is organized and healthy. I really like braids because my natural hair is real wirey. When the wind blows it it stays there and doesn’t fall back down and I look really silly. ------------------------------------ LOL. At wiry! I good use some tips. But see, who has all that time to spend in the salon every other Saturday? Women with busy lives and families need to be able find something that's quick and can get yo on the go. Maybe a mouse would stop the fly away look? Try it. But some mouses make your hair hard. Try one with some good moisturizing properties. If you don't like it, wash it out girl. ---------------------------------------------------- If I have my hair in weave or braided it let’s me love my natural hair so that I don’t have to put chemicals in it. ---------------------------------------------------- Me too, I don't want the chems. Years and years of that has actually changed to the texture and color of my hair. It'w weirdo brown or something! LOL. But when I wear weave or braids I love to glamorize. It is going to be long. I really like to have fun with it. If someone says is that your hair. I say yes because I bought it.lol. --------------------------------------- Teeheeeeee, someone asked me today about my wig and she said I love it (White lady). She said is that your hair and I said you can go over to such and such street and ask for this brand and get you one.... I enjoy wigs too but my son tries to be funny and snatch them off in front of everybody. lol. So what I do is make sure I have some cute simple braided style underneath so I don’t have to be too embarassed.lol. Hahahahahaha, is he playing arouund. Poor friendly having the boys snatching off her wig. A cousin of mine did that to my mom years ago at an event. Not for nothing it made me mad but it did look at hot mess. But if I wear it without the braids or weave I like to have it relaxed so I can keep it in a wrap style that I don’t have to use curling irons and sprays which also can damage the hair too. When my hair gets damaged, it just falls out and then…oh boy….. Hey I love that song my India Arie featuring Akon called I am not my hair “….hey I am not my hair, I am not this skin, I am not your expectation…I am a soul that lives within….does the way I wear my hair make me a better person….”. Oh that song is deep. ---------------------- That song is DEEP. I like it to friendly.....I like India period.

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  49.   PetiteChick says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    @Marlarki5 3:45a.m. Comment by Malarki5 on 12 May 2010: @ PetiteChick, I think Hannes is turned on by women who fight back…as opposed to women who are merely feisty. Some Euro men pay Black women top dollar to beat the living daylights out of them lol Menelik Charles London England ---------------------------------------------------- Teeeheeeheeee. Well, I'm gonna stop that fetish in its tracks. I will agree with "massa" on everything his says. Say he was "right" about me and how foolish I was/have been for telling him he said one thing when he says he said another. (which by the way, is here for all to read). ----------------- @Hannes 72: 3:48a.m. I agree with you Hannes72. I was put in my place by you. Oh wise one. I have been the problem here even though this problem existed waaaay before I got here. I recognize my faults and will bow down to massa living in the richest country in the world which is Austria. Who, by the way is part of the EU, which ain't doing all that hot right now, with American and other nations within the EU getting ready to bail out Greece. I knew your superiority complex would show. It usually does if you give people enough time and rope to hang themselves. You are from Austria. A wonderful enclave of people with riches and us poor pions in America suffer for oil and greed. You are so right Hannes72. You have just proved a point for me, and I thank you oh wise one. You were right. You and your wisdom and worldliness know best. Americans are poor and we are not deserving to be in the same category as Austria (the size of our state of Maine). I bow down to to kiss your dirty feet. Oh massa...You were right all along. I see the err of my ways. Oh please forgive thee.....

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  50.   Member says:
    Posted: 12 May 10

    There seems to be a lot of biased people in here *tisk tisk* shame... Moving on to my point: If someone has a preference of who they date, regardless of race, then that is only their business because who are you to tell them what's right or wrong? No one deserves to be called "sell-out" for dating whoever they like. Some might ask what race I am & what my preferences are: I'm a white male w/ no preference in race... ONLY STANDARDS. I'm all for a classy woman regardless of race. Beautiful can come in many forms. -Stephen G.

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