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Why white men love the black woman

Posted by James, 31 Aug

Ever wondered why some white guys, love black women so much?

It seems that being a white male and proclaiming your attraction to black women (not only sexually, but also romantically) may lead to a lot of controversial and dangerous things. Let’s leave the debate of why more black women may be opening themselves up to white guys. The main focus of this debate is: why some white guys are opening themselves to black women. Let’s concentrate on that.

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Most white males don’t feel like they are running short of white women to marry. White males just marry at high rates. So question is: Why black women? The thing is it will not be fair to bundle up black women as one since everyone is their own person… be it in appearance or personality.

However, one thing that a white male friend of mine said… and I let him get away with bundling it all up is: “We love a black woman's confidence, her tenacity and her undeniable achievements in the face of great adversity...᾿ Since this info was coming from a man, there was definitely the mention of the lips, the curves, and that wonderful skin as well.

So what about stereotypes like “black women are either sexually conservative or total sluts?" Many people give so much lip service to interracial dating sites. You would think they have never done it. But those uptight individuals are the ones that spread these stereotypes. What happened to the highly educated black woman? How about the caring, decent and involved black woman?

Probably most white guys and others are confused with the stereotypical trash people spread around and if you are one that falls for such lame ol’ lines, then you sure as hell haven’t dated a black woman.

Bottom line, you don't have to sacrifice who you are for a white guy. They will love you anyway. Just be you and open yourself up… and if you like white guys, some white guy will find you too.

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  1.   Chronik says:
    Posted: 08 Oct 08

    jsut a white guy....lol...you need to go back to school or something. Learn how to spell. You make no sense.

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  2.   Member says:
    Posted: 08 Oct 08

    Black women turn me on not because they are black, but who they are as people. I was married to a white women for 24 years. then started dateing a black women after two year leaving my wife. Black women have always been an intrest. Meet a black women who was ten years my younger and have been hooked since. It has nothing to do with color, everything to do with who she is..

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  3.   RockerChick27 says:
    Posted: 06 Oct 08

    Sorry. My job is biasing me towards telling him to see a psychologist, but it's not a bad idea. And, I can tell you---it's not just for crazy people or people with extreme issues or anything. We're trained to help with these things too. I'm glad to hear your input of your choice of men, Beauty. Attraction is a funny, funny thing, and it is quite influential. In addition to Beauty's words, Mackdaddy, I'll tell you that people also go into relationships looking to change *themselves* too. That generally doesn't happen, but I suppose it depends on what they wish to change. You should make three lists: two listing the traits of your to-be girlfriend and your ex, and then one of your ideal women (try to keep it realistic… keeping yourself in lala land is not going to help you out). Circle the traits of each that disturb you and compare the lists. Think about why you desire the traits you listed---and be real with yourself. Don't hold back. If there's something you think you don't want to list but you should, list it. Those are the ones that count. Bare in mind which traits---good or bad---come to mind first. Also try to see if any of the traits remind you of someone else and examine your relationship with them. A lot to do, haha. As I said earlier, asking your friends what they think of your choices is a good idea too. But make sure you ask the ones who tell the truth and not just what you want to hear. I swear, those people are so… eh. And… I'm glad we agree on something, Beauty. Lolz. I still stick to the research though… -RoChi P.S. How old do you have to be to post on this site? It bugs me when people condemn one color group and then say there's beauty in every color >.>

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  4.   Copperlovely says:
    Posted: 06 Oct 08

    Thanks tatted2death fpr you comments. I am 59 made an error when typing in my age. I will be 60 years old this December. A Light has gone on for me...enjoy each day to the fullest and remain the person that I am.....traditional values intact. ...and one day a man will come along who sees, honors, and values who I am. I have given love away all my life long and it will come back to me...of this I am sure. ...yes I am tired of grown men playing games. I work most weeks 7 days a week..some days 12 hours a day. I take very good care of myself.....bad knees don't keep me down...LOL! Anyway to comment on the topic...that's why white men love us......we are strong and hardworking, and take care and pride our home and all it's contents....mates and children. I am truly searching for a white gentleman. They have proved (when entering into a relatioship for all the right reasons) to be very adoring, loving, and caring as well as more attentive and appreciative. ...And I give ALL of this in return. The best to all, Copperlovely P.S. What are these 'kids' doing on this website??????????? C

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  5.   tatted2death says:
    Posted: 06 Oct 08

    Hello Good People To copperlovely: thanks for relating your point of view. You know, you remind me of an aunt of mine in sooo many ways. Sweet woman that has grown tired of "grown" men playing games, yet she remains single AND strong....one day her "prince" will come...of this I am sure. Did I read correctly???.....does Ms. Chatty want to become an author???......WHOOO HOOOOO.....that's what I am talking about..making it happen in here. So glad you have been inspired; you've definitely got what it takes!!! (and I better see a "shout out" in your book.....LOL.) This little corner of cyber-space has sparked up quite a bit of change/progress in certain people's lives and I think that is pretty darn cool. It also seems to have solidified others' penchants for being self righteous "know-it-alls"...oh well. All is well for me as my tenacity and passion remain intact. And I hope everyone continues to learn and grow from their experiences here. Peace and Blessings tatted2death

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  6.   Member says:
    Posted: 05 Oct 08

    15?.....Ooo, It's a good thing you're not mine. Because the only thing you'd be looking at is those school books. (And I truely mean that with lots and lots of love!)

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  7.   Member says:
    Posted: 05 Oct 08

    15?.....Ooo, It's a good thing you're not mine. Because the only thing you'd be look at is those school books. (And I truely mean that with lots and lots of love!)

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  8.   hello says:
    Posted: 05 Oct 08

    WOW IM A TEENAGER(15YRS OLD) LOOKIN AT THIS AND YES I AM MIXED DOMINICAN AND WHITE IV DATED ALL KINDS OF MEN BUT MORE SEEM TO BE BLACK AND NOW..ITS LIKE IV CHANGED MY MIND A WHOLEE LOT IT SEEMS TO BE THAT BLACK MEN ARE PLAYERS/AND LIERSSS... AND NOW EVERY BLACK GUY THAT HAS ASKED ME OUT I PAY NO ATTENTION TO THEM ANYMORE THEY DISCUSS ME NOW...IM STARTING TO NOTICE LATINOSSS MORE WHITEEE GUYS AND EVEN JAPANESE WOW ISINT THAT SOMETHIN!!! ANY GUY THAT IS SWEET TO ME NOMATTER WHAT HE IS......WILL BE MY TYPE OF GUY LOVE IS BEUTIFUL IN EVERY COLOR.

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  9.   Copperlovely says:
    Posted: 05 Oct 08

    Hello to all of you! First on all I'd like to say that I do not look like it but I am of Afr. Am. Cau. and West Indian. plus decent....smile Let's face all of us are 'mixed'...smile! Try to remember that ones opinion here is related 'their' experiences. We should try to respect that. Everyone is entitled to their opinion of anything. Getting uptight and rude over someone's opinion teaches nothing. Posting my experience is what I am about to do. Who knows...maybe it will help someone grow! I have been divorced and single for eight years. I have dated men of different races. These are 'my' experiences....as i go about my daily routine. I come across very few black men who will even speak to me or look my way. This has been very dissappointing to me. Latin men treat me like a 'queen'. Caucasian and Latin men have stopped to rescue me from a flat tire or just plain 'ole see me looking for something in the automotive dept. and ask me if I need help finding something. Men of other races freely comment of my dress etc., while black men pass me by w/o a word or a smile. It's as if they think that if they speak I'll want them to marry me to say the least.... I am a very neat, they say attractive 50 yr. old woman who tries to in spite of the aging, leave the house looking my best. I have always been this way. I am sick an tired of black men saying they are looking for a woman without drama, make-up, and ones who wears her own hair. I wonder if these men have looked in the mirror at themselves lately????? Smile! Bald heads, beer guts.... showing up on dates in the 'wrong clothes'....the list goes on. Yes I still have long hair, but it is thin. I take care of my skin, but with age comes problems. People always thought my hair was wig anyway when I was younger...smile. So yes I wear wigs, add hair, wear make-up; as do all all the beautiful woman in Hollywood and the rest of the world. I am happy with myself and who I am on the inside. All this other 'stuff', when you get right down to it doesn't matter. If a man showed up on a date with a cane to assist him in his walking, so what? It's 'him' I want to get to know, Just as my knees aren't what they use to be and going up and down stairs can be difficult for me. To be embarrassed bscause I can run and have to go slow on steps seems a little insensative to me; as do all the other things that me seem to want a woman to possess her whole life long. I am truly looking for a man of any race who will adore, love and respect me for who I am on the inside. To stay around and come to know that my exterior beauty matches my internal beauty. So what if it takes me a while to put on my make-up in the morning. Quality take time! With all that being said, let's learn to respect each other and our differences...likes and dislikes Copperlovely

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  10.   rihtnow says:
    Posted: 05 Oct 08

    Scorpio05..........obviously he's inexperienced, acting like a kid, but as a kid he must have some strong feelings for you to give you that kind of attention. How about arranging a lunch between the both of you and take it from there? Just my thoughts.

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  11.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 08

    Excuse my typos... Very rough day at work today... Am I giving the right answers to the questions????? lol...lol... I am super tired. I am going home and kick my feet up and watch 88 minutes!

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  12.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 04 Oct 08

    Now, going to a psych is going a little too far to me, but.... Ya know, who am I? I don't know you, but you seem to be an alright dude. I just think you shouldn't jump in so fast with all you have. Slow down and enjoy the ride. There are some really nice young women out her that will love you forever and ever! Don't settle for anything less than what you want. I try to remember, when I'm dating is this... I don't have the power to change anyone the way that I want them to be. So, what I see is what I get. Can I deal with that? Oftentimes, I think that people go into relationships with the intentions of trying to change the other person the way they want them to be. You marry this person and then it doesn't work, because you realize that you couldn't change them and your tolerance level has expanded to the point of explosion. Then what? You teach people how to treat you. If you say that no matter what, no woman can hit me. If she hits me, then I am leaving. If your woman hits you, then you leave. But if you keep making excuses why you are letting her treat you this way... She will continue, until you put an end to it. Don't tolerate nothing less than KING treatment, if you are good man, now. Don't expect KING treatment and you ain't worth a 1/2 penny. There are billions and billions of women in the world, who is ready to treat you like a King.

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  13.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 08

    Well, We have finally agreed with something.. Rocker. Hi five to you !!!! Mack Daddy, how important is it to have a good woman? Would you be willing to date a woman 300 pounds with no hair? I am not telling you that 300 pound women and the only good ones. But sometime, I think that we have to look deeper than what are eyes can see. Oftentimes, we (black women) overlook men, because they are not tall enough... or they don't have an earring or their stomach is too big... excuses... excuses... and never look at the person. Many of my friends, tell me that I like ugly men..lol... Because I am not always attracted to what looks good on the outside. Rocker is right... examine the examples of the women, you've grown up seeing your whole life and see where you stand with that. Every man that I have exclusively dated for some time has always told me that the one thing that have always loved about me was... I love hard. I always have their interest in mind...... I think that is a compliment. I love hard, but will leave fast, if you don't act right.

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  14.   1rockgodess says:
    Posted: 02 Oct 08

    B BOLD BY BLACK AND I WOULD RATHER DIE THAN NOT BE A BLACK WOMAN....M SO IN LOVE WITH BEING ME AND BLACK! BLACK ROCKS.... PEACE!

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  15.   RockerChick27 says:
    Posted: 02 Oct 08

    I'll also say to Beauty that I am glad you are trying to help him with the situation instead of jumping out and attacking him @_@ -RoChi

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  16.   MackWhiteDaddy28 says:
    Posted: 02 Oct 08

    So crazy it must be true. Ok, some explanation seems in order. I believed that since last time my ex-wife left four years ago she took the computer we had at the time and bounced to N. California where her 3rd grade boyfriend lived they she hooked back up with. Since even after she came back about 2.5 years ago that P.C. was in storage still up there Cali. I even paid for it more than once. Anyway, I needed the computer she robbed on Sunday to do my homework after all, now I got to roll to the library just to show you some love. I will always love my ex-wife...don't get me wrong, but I'm not in love with her and I'm happier, and somewhat drama free except for this other girl who's really got me twisted. Sometimes I wonder if I'm getting into the same relationship I just got out of. My mom said she thought she was looking at my ex wife when I sent her pictures of my new drama queen. Other than that I just want to be loved like everybody else. I really do have a lot to offer. I think it scares a lot of women, because they automatically start thinking marriage when they see me, or are just straight scared to approach me. I just wish I could find a women that would be true 4ever 4real. Many ladies...say they will, but I can't find one that makes the cut. So I give up, because the only women I find attractive just want to rip my heart out... I believe that is why, the ladies might agree with me, that this is partially why their are so few "good" men who would be willing to shed every last blood sweat and tear 4 their lady, and be willing to die for the women in there lives; who want nothing more than to spend their lives making yours better. That's all I ever wanted...this is the conviction of my reality Beauty. What it Be

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  17.   RockerChick27 says:
    Posted: 02 Oct 08

    MackDaddy, I’m going to take a shot with this, playing off of what Beauty said. Rather than looking inside yourself, I am going to ask you to recall the types of women you grew up around. Often, when we grow up in very stressful environments, we tend to seek people like those we grew up around. Beauty gave you some very good advice in trying out some people you don’t like. Usually, though, it’s best to ask a friend—--unless your friends are like-minded (not that your thinking is bad. It just won’t help much if you’re basically asking yourself >.>). She’s got it right though... try to figure out what you like about them so much and why you didn’t give her the computer. I’d actually recommend seeing a therapist; they can help a lot more than we can. Or The moving on part though… that’s gonna take a lot of work. I don’t know what your situation is, but giving her the computer back probably won’t resolve much of anything. You’re going to have to get to the root of the problem (which could be expressing itself by her stealing the computers and whatever and your reactions). Again, I recommend a psychologist. -RoChi

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  18.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 02 Oct 08

    Thanks, Jarrita Hotsauce... (Tatted)

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  19.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 02 Oct 08

    You're cute MackDaddy.... That's for sure. It's funny... I have a friend who attracts the wrong kind of men in her life. She has this profile.. She loves a very very dark man... bald head.... extrememly tall... football player looking man. She wants her men to look like Shaq... lol... Everytime she finds a man, he is crazy. I mean CRAZY!!!!!!! Now, she has come to the conclusion that the only type of man she likes is a sane man. I always tell her, if you look at a man and you don't like him. Date him. lol... If you do like him... RUN!!!!! Because she can't pick a good man to save her life. lol... lol.. Look within yourself Mack and do self inventory of yourself and your life... Look at your motives.. Why didn't you just give her the computer? Is it because in your heart, you still love her? Is it, because her reaction excites you? Or simply it's because you have met Queen Drama? lol...lol... If you want to move on... give her what she is suppose to have and move on... Your mouthwash? She stole your mouthwash? Your fruit basket? lol...lol.... Wow! That is deep.

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  20.   MackWhiteDaddy28 says:
    Posted: 01 Oct 08

    I guess I'm part of the drama true beauty. The robbery doesn't surprise me, and I expected it sooner, becuase I refused to relinquish 2 computers to her; it is a community property issue. The ex-wife stole my computer and mouth rinse and fruit basket??? I was ignoring her phone calls because I don't want to end up back with her for guaranteed drama... it's happened before. The issue with the girl who wants to be my wife is more troublesome, it got me so stressed that I couldn't go to work because I got physically ill and barely made it to school yesterday. She admitted it was her fault and now she feels like she does not deserve me. Am I some kind of drama king? Or just attract women in crisis???

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  21.   geneandthem says:
    Posted: 01 Oct 08

    Ok Here let me do it for You all! DUDE!!!!!!! What you are talking about has nothing to do with Sisters!! ITS THE WOMAN YOU DATE!!! Any Woman Can bring you Drama If you are dating a drama filled Woman! Come on! You need to be mad at yourself! Not at the drama filled woman that you date and you most def cant bring Down all "Sisters" Into your lil drama filled world! i have said this before and I will say it again I am going on 20 years dating black woman only! Never dated any other woman but a sister and I can assure you that of all of them maybe one was a lil crazy but it had nothing to do with her race! SHE WAS JUST BUGGED OUT and that was a long time ago! Change your game up and date a different kind of woman you will see a big Difference!

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  22.   tatted2death says:
    Posted: 01 Oct 08

    Beauty..... you are on point with what you are saying. too many people want to find out what's wrong with the "other person" when the problem JUST MIGHT BE THEMSELVES.

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  23.   tatted2death says:
    Posted: 01 Oct 08

    Ashley, what you smoking man???.....LOL....please clarify. If you speaking on addressing certain "lost souls" in here....I am D-O-N-E...done with that career track.....been there, and got the phucked up t-shirt....LOL Peace tatted2death

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  24.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 01 Oct 08

    Hmmmm..... "Why do sistas give me so much drama?" Why do they? What are you giving them? I am not getting smart, but men blow me with some things.... I have several males friends both black, white, hispanic.... They talk to me a lot about relationships and different things. One thing that I seen with all of them is this... They meet a young lady. She's cute. Big Butt. The whole works... They are really physically attracted to this lady. In the beginning, they see that the girl is beautiful on the outside, but is disturbed on the inside. Yet, they continue to mess with her. She doesn't have a clean house. She doesn't have much of a career, if she has one. She is living off something or somebody. She doesn't have the best mind. She's just pretty. Then after they decide to move on and the girl begins to act disturbed. They want to act like it was a surprise and they don't know why the girl is acting that way... If she was crazy in the beginning... do you really think, she's changed? For the record Mack Daddy.. I don't know your ex... but she was probably drama from the beginning. I've also learned that men are sometimes more drama than women. I've learned that from my male friends and counterparts... Men do more gossip! lol..lol... My point is this.. Make sure you're not starting the drama. lol.. lol...

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  25.   GENEANDTHEM says:
    Posted: 30 Sep 08

    School ladies??? Anyone please????

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  26.   MackWhiteDaddy28 says:
    Posted: 30 Sep 08

    I hate drama. Why do sisters bring me so much drama? Last night my ex-wife robbed my house. I go to my girls house and sure enough more drama. I can't take it somethings gotta give.

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  27.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 30 Sep 08

    Hello everyone!!!!! Miss you guys.... I've been popping in and out.... I've been going out with my new marine friend. But today... I went out with this "black" guy, I met not too long ago... VERY NICE GUY!!!!! I met this tennis pro, too. In my line of work, I run across men with really nice careers. The tennis pro is not my type. I haven't hit it off too well with him. We are in 2 different directions.. He's a fine white man, too. UMMMMMM... UMMMM I need a job at the love oasis... Are they still hiring? lol...

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  28.   Member says:
    Posted: 29 Sep 08

    The courage to love-another good movie. vanessa williams.true story. Tat. Gonna write a book. For real. Pray for me. Started a few times but didn't follow through. Been inspired....:) Leaveit2me-that's what I'm saying. You found the man of your dreams but you made sure you didn't miss any blessings. You ARE desirable, black woman, and deserve to be adored, admired, wined and dined, appreciated, respected and loved by ALL men! I'm just saying...try on all the shoes-not just the same comfy heels you always wear. Try some open toe red patent leather stilettos, some stappy metallic 3 inchers, a hot animal print "pump it up" pump! You feelz me? You might discover something new about yourself...don't be scared! As my baby sister says-I love love and everything about it! I am all for the hearts poppin around your head and pounding heart beating out of your chest and the breathlessness of your lover's voice in your ear while.....talking sexy on the phone all night...You dirty birds! What did you THINK I was gonna say!? Peace&Blessings Cupid

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  29.   Member says:
    Posted: 29 Sep 08

    Love Oasis is open for business! Look at all our new guests, Tat! Love the flow in the room...Nice. Whatcha love about us...what we love bout you... Sometimes it's not about preference. Sometimes it's about a blessing,destiny,courage to explore something new-opening your mind to love/romance/friendship. To see beyond the pigment and feel the essence of a man or woman. I had an epiphany when I was in nursing school-ooh..knowing more about me.. Anatomy class...cadaver...open chest...lungs,heart,small and large bowels,etc.(I know...graphic but stay with me!) I came, at that moment, to appreciate the brilliance of God on many levels. 1.We are wonderfully and mysteriously made. 2.We are all packaged exactly the same under the pigment. Same contents,same order, same powers of sight,touch, taste(you feel me...) 3.We all have the capacity and the priviledge to love whomever we want-ultimately it doesn't matter-we're all the same. I already knew this, but to see it in the flesh-pun intended-was profound for me. Scorpio-life is short. Don't let opportunities pass you by...or the potential of romance. Sounds like dude was shy and maybe unsure how to kick it up a notch. Maybe you are THAT incredible! Even though he didn't call you still spoke twice a week.Hmmm. I would think he would avoid your weekly convo if he wasn't interested. You may not be crushing on him but he may be crushing on you, hence puppy dog stare and smiles. Do you still see him and speak to him? Maintain a friendship and keep taking the wheel of initiative. Don't miss out on something sweet that could have nothing to do with color and everything to do with how wonderful he thinks you are. He may rock your world once you let him in past the foyer. Not trying to make something out of nothing Scorp..just saying...if you still chat ask him what he's doing Friday night and meet for a drink..as friends..ya know(wink wink) Watcha got ta lose? nuttin. Watcha got ta gain? a good friend. After all..you do talk twice a week... I'm just sayin.... Cupid;-)

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  30.   RockerChick27 says:
    Posted: 28 Sep 08

    I suggest you ask him, Scorpio. I'm sure we could all list a gabillion reasons, but they are all useless since we (assumedly) don't know you or the man of which you speak. It could be anything you listed or something much more complicated. (Even if someone suggests something you think makes sense, it's best to ask him yourself and find out first-hand.) Just don't hold too much weight on what us internet folk have to say. Not if we don't know the situation. -RoChi

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  31.   Scorpio05 says:
    Posted: 28 Sep 08

    OMG!! I was up to three trying to read all the messages people wrote, and honestly I agree with some; other I have to say don't make any sense. I'm 20 and half black half native american, and i have always dated black guys, but lately I've had this crush on a white guy that i met at my job..... The problem is I'm more of an out going person so i gave the guy my number and he never called me but i still talk with him twice a week. But he gives me that puppy dog stare and smiles and stares more.... still nothing??? So can anyone tell me why he reacts like that is it because i'm black ad he's white or is he just extremely shy?? anyway i don't have a crush on him anymore I would just want to know why...

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  32.   Learning says:
    Posted: 27 Sep 08

    I love what you said Leaveit2 me. I am open to who treats me well and shows me love. What's the point in being on this Earth if you are not open to love.

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  33.   Luvdocta says:
    Posted: 26 Sep 08

    Hi.To me,i could see that,the white women like the black guys for interracial marriage b'se we're strong,we are good at bed and we perform well on our duties. I'd never dated a white girl untill when i became a waiter and met a Norwagian girl whom i was a friend with, and latter we became lovers. She was very interested in me b'se i was doing well and performing my duty well on bed. She loved me and i loved her,but as at now we're no more together b'se she said my love for her was too strong and i made her scared. If any interested lady is here looking for Luvdocta,then,i'm here for you and you could link with me for better friendship. John.

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  34.   steellab says:
    Posted: 26 Sep 08

    The first black woman I dated out of curiosity, I found something very beautiful. It is the aura of a woman that knocks me over. After dating a black woman for a period of time you habituate to the differences, there needs to be more for it to last. Any way anybody out there looking for a man that cooks, cleans and holds a steady job and is very attentive. No drinking or gambling. Drop me aline!

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  35.   RockerChick27 says:
    Posted: 26 Sep 08

    I agree with you, Leaveit2me… I get tired of all the people who say that there are no attractive black women. I just can’t decide who is more annoying when they say it. I’ll just say they all hurt somewhat and it’s tiresome (and then when you say it’s hurtful, they go, “So I’m racist ‘cause I have a preference?!” Nobody said you can’t have one and nobody said you’re racist. People get so defensive about nothing. That’s why I am amused when people put words in other people’s mouths or always jump the gun or take things personally when no one is talking to or about them. It makes them seem guilty and… so obviously confused.) I’m just saying it hurts. They’ve never met or seen me and they already judge that I am a loud, ugly, hairy, greasy ghetto bitch---‘cause I’m black? (I’m just using adjectives I frequently hear to describe black women.) But, hey, to give us some slack, they always say that SOME black women are exceptions… Mariah Carey, Halle Berry, Tyra Banks… >.> <.< The world is ignorant and it will stay that way so long as we keep encouraging people to think the way they always do and never challenge it. I think that shows such a weak person it’s not even funny, and it’s where problems arise. Question yourself---your deepest thoughts. Why are they so important? Are they right? Have you seeked the opposite opinions, just to make sure yours hold? Or are you just being ridiculously stubborn? Recall the negative things, in this case, why black women are unattractive (I was actually in another blog asking that question… it has about 3000+ responses. I was just observing. Most of the people on it say they don’t think black people are attractive), and really question why. What is it influenced from? Is it personal experiences or something else? People use “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” like an excuse. I’m not saying that it is untrue, but they act like it is genetic and influenced by nothing. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but who’s to say that the beholder has perfect vision…?” Attraction is a funny thing, and it is influenced by a lot—--more than the average person thinks and a lot more than we know, I’m sure. Denying a whole race is rather peculiar and shows prejudice more than an innocent preference, especially with the extreme variations in black women. Everybody, really. But, whatever. -RoChi

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  36.   Leaveit2me says:
    Posted: 26 Sep 08

    I am deeply disappointed by some of the posts by the scared white women on this board and the small minded black women on here. I am a black woman and I am glad that some men are finally discovering that, "Hey Black women exist too!" I am sick and tired of seeing white women on t.v. shows, movies, and magazines posing next to a black guy and I'm like, WTF? You're telling me No Black woman is attractive? Thats bull. I dated outside my race before and loved it, I am now engaged to a wonderful black man, but the point is, black women are learning that other races desire them too, and for all black women to keep their minds and souls open to receiving that love.

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  37.   tatted2death says:
    Posted: 25 Sep 08

    "Jerrita Hotsauce"...that definitely would be my stripper/porn name....LMAO. trust and believe this "lil engine that could" is all about keeping it good in the hood aka the global community..... Beauty....you know I wish you all the best with your new "beau".....nothing but the best Peace and Blessings tatted2death P.S......MAN, Chatty I keep reading that last post of yours....(hearing Thicke singing in my ears everytime; visualizing a Ving-built guy...ooooo.....lol).....I missed your need-to-be-writing-a-romance-novel azz....LMAO....so glad you literally weathered the storm...peace and love sent.

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  38.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 25 Sep 08

    Hey... Ashley (Cupid) Can we lounge everyday? lol.... Thanks.. This marine guy is soooo nice. Yes, He can pick me up..lol..lol... I just got home from meeting him for dinner and he is FINE! He is a lil' weird (kinda), but he's a marine. They are all "somewhat" weird. Jerrita (Jerry Springer Comparison - Tatted) Keep on keeping on. It's all good in the hood.

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  39.   tatted2death says:
    Posted: 24 Sep 08

    ****WARNING!!!!: THE FOLLOWING POST CONTAINS A LOT OF PERSONAL REFERENCES AND COMMENTS.....IF YOUR PRECIOUS BLOODSHOT EYES CAN STAND TO READ THAT SORT OF THING PLEASE... DON'T BE DROLL AND JUST SCROLL.***** CHATTY!!!!.....DAGNABIT!!!!lol ....you must have felt the vibes I've been sending to you.....but I really must be psychic though because I had no idea you were in Tejas, chica.....WHOA!!!(what we experienced up in KY was nothing compared to the Gulf states) I must tell you, your post was like a "drink of crystal clear love" for this woman "in the desert of dissension". And if I may, I'd like to revise the name of our sanctuary....THE LOVE OASIS.....lol I'd like to call it this because "lounge" implies we are in there doing nada. But I think our mere pressence and focus(i.e. typing positive messages)is an active force....calling for a change for the better. Not having "delusions of grandeur" here just letting it be known that words can make a difference...THEY DO HAVE POWER. ("BACK, Internet Demons, BACK"....lol). We can chill and do some good...simultaneously...we might have to charge (some) for the pleasure of just stepping in the door....LOL. Peace and Blessings (4EVA) tatted2death P.S. (to lovinlivin)...loved the spirit of your posts but I can't agree that it has to be about the comparisons to white women...you are right it is subjective. ......lol, you know what's funny,.......despite being compared to an episode of Jerry Springer (that was a bit harsh and off the mark but whatever..LOL) we still manage to attract the men here.....so YES, THERE IS DEFINITELY SOMETHING ABOUT US WOMEN OF COLOR...NO DOUBT....LOL.

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  40.   lovinlivin says:
    Posted: 24 Sep 08

    Hi all, I am new to this love feast. I am fortish and involved with a white man though he is as much of a mutt as I am racially. But he is a good egg and I plan to keep him. I have to say I am one of those multi racial women (considered black) that has always liked the white boys/men. From the time I was young , I was attracted to them. I think maybe it was the straight hair and light eyes. Though I can't remember for certain, because the first little boy that caught my attention had creamy brown eyes. Not that that matters at all eye wise are family has the most beautiful I have seen. Lots of green, gold, hazel in the mix. Sorry I digressed, I have always been an eye person you see. So from the start I guess I was headed in the interracial dating direction. We lived in a small town where out of almost two hundred in our graduating class there was maybe ten black kids. Even though we lived on the black side of town I was always close with my white counterparts. Again it was very small and in many ways intimate because of the size. It's possible that was part of the reason for my attraction to them. I don't really know but it has always been my thing. Sometimes I thought I may have just like the idea of controversy, especially back in the 1980's when the idea was still new. LOL. But either way over the years I have been also been attracted to black men from time to time. Which leads me to believe that it maybe, stay with me know, it was more about personality then color. Yep, I think after the dust settles its all about who you can relate to and less about the looks. Relationships are based on a lot of things but to stay together in the long run you have to be able to communicate effectively. So why do white men love black women? Possibly, because when it comes down to it they see something in Black Women that they don't always find in white women. Whether it be soft curves or an openess to new things, or like other relationships a connectiveness of the heart that transcends every thing else. Of course, that is all subjective. My two cents, and it's late so forgive me if it was random or disorganized, I will do better next time. Later,

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  41.   Member says:
    Posted: 24 Sep 08

    Where my girlz at? A-Team! Tat..BeautyBeyond Words, come have a seat next to me and KayJude. I want to tell her how her story moved me. Ashley-boy you know I joined this blog cause your crazy ass and Tat are like...just the right kinda buzz!Come over here and let me tell you how you can blow Obama out the game! (you know I'm you and Tat's press secretary!)Boy-mi miss ya like cook food! Everyone is welcome at the love lounge but there is no bullshit allowed! Leave it outside.I am officially opening the doors. The lights are dim, the air is fragrant with vanilla and sandlewood and I am pouring glasses of Moscato and putting the second Robin Thicke in the speakers. The air is cool and the vibe is hot in here. All those in favor of chilling the *%@!* out and getting back to mingling and appreciating diversified love and affection can join us. Chronik,Ashley,rihtnow-you hit the nail on the head. I am happy for you all and that you simply have found love. It's a beautiful thing. I found it and it can be a pain in my ass but damn it, it's worth everything to have someone not just love you but want to co-exist with you. You are her deep inhale-she is your sweet exhale. Anywaaayyy... Sorry I have been out of the love lounge for a minute-had life and Tina's triflin ass man to contend with(Ike came to kick in some fences and powerlines around here-has some homeless and sitting in the dark and other washed out to sea with their homes they couldn't part with....say a little prayer please...) My eyes are bloodshot from catching up-missed ya'll and welcome to the new folks-especially the boys! Glad you all have come to the sandbox to share! We love to hear what you have to say, your love stories, questions, insight, and compliments. It feels so good to hear a man say what he loves about you and he don't even know you. He knows he loves the essence of you. I see some a ya'll stirrin shit up. Hmmm. It's all good. There are always gonna be those people out there who are hell bent on nitpicking and dissecting. Determined to be miserable, faultfinding, unhappy finger-pointing complainers. People who take themselves too seriously and over analyze in an attempt to be deep but are just simply...exhausting. After a while nobody wants to hear shit you have to say. You can write an essay on here, and if you make me laugh out loud, nod enthusiastically in agreement, feel genuine joy for you (congrats Ashley!!!blessings to you and your love!) or even think something I read was profound enough to stick in my head the next day-then it's worth the effort to read. Otherwise-dems just wurdz. Beauty-I always say it's a beautiful thing to find a man who can pick you up and do stuff....(have you seen Ving Rhames in the movie Baby Boy???) Oh, and all that other stuff about your Marine...his conversation and presence..that's good too! Has anyone read "The Color of Water" by James McBride? Good read. How much does color matter when it comes to who you love?How you love? Love is necessary and essential...like water. Love quenches a desert-dry thirst...like water. on that note-peace and blessings ChattyCupid aka Ashley-n-Tat4prez

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  42.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 24 Sep 08

    That's what I'm talking about riihtnow and chronik... We have been off the subject for some time and off the subject of the whole matter.... Your comments were nice and I hope to see more like them. Thanks for the love!!!!! I recently met a young man in the marines. He's about 6'5 and weigh about 300Ibs and is a complete muscle. When I think of him... I get chills all over my body. He's a big ole' country cute white boy. So far.. So good... I meet men all the time, but its been something different about him. Besides, he is a complete physical turn on. His conversation... His presence... I AM EXCITED!!!!!

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  43.   RockerChick27 says:
    Posted: 23 Sep 08

    Newyorkgirl, I am not sure, but I think you missed the point of his question. Your point should be considered, as it is an excellent point, but I think he is searching for something deeper than, "Well, I see more of white women/black men, so that's why!" or "It's unusual, so naturally I fear it somewhat!" That's not stating the specific reason(s) why it bothers them to see white male/black female. Well, it is, but I think you get what I mean ;) Actually, I would consider *that* a good question to get someone to think. It doesn't sound like it's attacking anyone, but getting them to ponder their thinking. It almost sounds rhetorical... ~RoChi

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  44.   Chronik says:
    Posted: 23 Sep 08

    rihtnow.....thank you so much. For saying what I was just thinking. I have for months now been on the down low, quietly reading everyone's post and not contributing to the discussion. Just being an observer I guess you could say. And lately its been getting kind of ridiculous. All this stuff about just comenting on the last person's post and disagreeing with what they said, and trying to pick apart what they said and trying to sound smarter than the next person. All this, I didnt say you said, that she said, blah blah blah freakin BLAH...Lets get back to what this is all about. The white man's love for the black woman. I happen to be one of those white men that love, and have a deep respect for black woman. I am currently in a wonderful relationship with a beautiful black woman. We are very much in love with each other, and there are definetly plans of marriage in the near future. I am a 30 year old athletic and handsome white guy, and i have just loved and been extremely attracted to black women for as long as i can remember. Its not that white women aren't attractive to me. I'm just more attracted to black women, a preference i guess you can say. And she, is exactly, everything I have always loved about black women. There is something that's just hard to describe, hard to put into words, what it is about black women that make me so attracted to them, both physically and mentally even when I am just in presence of one. Maybe its their voice, the beautiful, smooth, sultry voice. Maybe its their distinct figure, body type, and the way they seem to move, so elegant and graceful. Maybe its the beautiful, smooth, brown skin that seems to represent a symbol of health and sexiness. Or maybe its just the confidence, boldness, and pride alot of black women just seem to portray. Well whatever it is, my beautiful, sexy ebony princess is all of the above. She is the quintessential example of everything i've ever loved about black women all wrapped into one package. Ok y'all, well I'm gonna leave it at that. Have a good day everyone. And I will become active in the discussion from now on, and say whats on my mind from time to time, rather than just sit back and read everyone else's post. And please, lets all stick to the topic and not let it go into what seems like an episode of the Jerry Springer Show. All we need is some chair throwing and some hair pulling and we'll fit right in..lol...Ok y'all...peace out and god bless.

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  45.   rihtnow says:
    Posted: 23 Sep 08

    Hey folks, I'm back. Little more info about me. I'm engaged to a beautiful black woman who truly loves me as I do her. I came on this site thinking there would be open dialogue about our(bw/wm) interests, why and wherefore we think as we do. Since my last post on the 15th I'm disappointed by the lack of inner thought sharing; instead I see much "philosophizing" of comments that beg of the "kiss" response(if you no what I mean). I'm not afraid to truly expound on my original comments. Instead of turning this forum into a stale exchange of replies, lets waste not our words on what we think as much as why others feel the way they do but on a much deeper level. No offense to those who are sharing their thoughts, just tellin it like I see it. Cheers!

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  46.   newyorkgirl says:
    Posted: 23 Sep 08

    Renaissance, you fail to realize the obvious. People are used to seeing black men with white women. Black men are obsessed with white women and have been dating them for decades. People are NOT used to Black women dating white men. And MOST black men are not okay with it- even black men who date white girls....

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  47.   reneissance says:
    Posted: 22 Sep 08

    Hi All, I'm a Black man who also dates interracially, but I have this question for the White guys. While in public, why do you so often stereotypically look at us Black guys, and assume we don't approve of your being with a Black woman? I, for one am pro I/R dating, and am embarrassed at any of my fellow Black contemporaries who may behave in a less than intelligent fashion at the sight of seeing a White guy, with a Black woman, but please know, not all Black guys feel animosity towards your pairing. Even though so many White guys look at me, as if to automatically assume I'm NOT ok with it. When I'm with my White girlfriend, I'm proud, confident, and assuming no one is going to hurt us, or disapprove, and to heck with em if they do. You guys should do the same. Anyways, Good Luck to all!

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  48.   RockerChick27 says:
    Posted: 22 Sep 08

    I never said you said I was attacking you. You must feel attacked, though, whether you want to admit it or not; otherwise, you would not be taking things not specifically addressed to you personally. Otherwise, you would not be saying things directly to or referring to me and complaining when I respond (i.e. “dissect” your post). I do accept your right not to answer the question, but you are not exercising that right. You claim to have answered the question already, which you have not, and then accuse me of requesting you repeat what you have said, which is impossible if you never said it in the first place. Now you’re saying that you don’t want to answer the question (although, at this point, I think we are speaking of two different questions). At any rate, I don’t see how the question is unclear. “If you were in a relationship that is being torn apart by seemingly everybody, do you think it’d strengthen or weaken it?” And I know the question is not what you were originally aiming for. That’s why I altered it >.> But it’s perfectly fine if you don’t want to answer the question. Just say so next time. (>.> And your e_edward analogy is not applicable here. You’re keeping up with the thread and either ignoring the questions or pretending to answer them. He probably isn’t even keeping up with the thread. There’s a difference <.< ) You imply you don’t feel attacked and yet you call this a battle. Interesting… Your PS is just shitting with words. All I see is you getting irritable because someone disagrees and would like to point it out (which isn’t allowed by anyone but you, I guess. Then it’s “stimulating the conversation”). The second it is pointed out, it is an attack (unless you classify a “pounce” as something else). Anyway, so what if I find some of these posts amusing? You and geneandthem are misquoting and misinterpreting my posts to death and getting riled up about it. Then you ask me to fully read and reread your posts when you evidently are not doing that for mine. What’s not laughable? To clarify, I am amused by your and geneandthem’s responses, not anyone else’s. Notice how I am only arguing with you two. You said you have nothing left to add. Good. We’ll move on from here, then. *White Men… Black women… Back on track… * Woman2, I really like your posts… :) -RoChi

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  49.   BeautyBeyondWords says:
    Posted: 20 Sep 08

    Hey Key Jude- Write a book. You had me going!!!!! lol.. lol...

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  50.   woman2 says:
    Posted: 20 Sep 08

    Kay Jude.......... Your post was authentic as well as mature. It takes us back to the root of this blog. It may well be that the Black Female/White Male relationship is one of the last taboos to overcome in a world that is crumbling inside and out. Like medicine for the sick soul in the fullness of time. This is what it will take to break the strongholds that keep us ill. There is something deeply inbedded that needs to be extricated and it's going to require a whole lot of love.

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